Howzat? 3.0 / 6

Don’t let the fact that professional rugby player Joe Marler hosts this show fool you – it isn’t a rugby-based podcast. There’s no statistical analysis of the Premiership here. Rather, this is the Radio 1 breakfast show regenerated for the 2020s but with a lingering aftertaste of humour anchored in the 1990s.

And like the Radio 1 breakfast show in the 90s, the ‘zoo format with the lads’ hasn’t aged brilliantly. Yes, it’s entertaining in parts but for large portions, the chat between Joe Marler, co-host Tom Fordyce and producer Ryan Bailey, sounds like a boisterous conversation you’d overhear on a train between a group of #thelads after several scoops of Stella on matchday. 

Let’s face it – this is the ‘That Peter Crouch Podcast’ but with Joe Marler in the chair instead of “Crouchy”.

As for this episode, it’s a pretty meta one (and to be fair to them, they usually have guests, but hey ho…)  – the idea is that they are meeting to discuss ways to grow their audience. The reality is, of course, it’s just another vehicle for their incredible “personalities” to shine through.

Even though it’s not the easiest to distinguish between the middle-class white men voices, Marler does bring some character at least to proceedings, and acts as some form of pilot light for the listener – but it’s the kind of character that suffers from [ADHAD + arrested development] having failed to graduate from dressing room banter. 

For example, he’s prone to spontaneous shouting out mid-topic and at one point he suddenly and excitedly smashes down a gravel hammer on the desk; or, in another moment of MAJOR LOLs, he takes a phone call half way through the show (ABSOLUTE SCENES!) because he’s bored. 

Other topics covered include bins (isn’t it weird that different parts of the country have different coloured bins, huh?); Marler’s new calendar (#thelads can’t get to the bottom of what size A0 is); and having conversations with fans at the urinal (talking to people with your cock out is absolute madness, huh?) 

Whatever floats your boat I guess. 

This show isn’t going to win any awards for originality. The premise of the podcast can be summarised in one pertinent section: when discussing the fact that one of Fordyce’ mate’s 12-year-old daughter listens to the “pod” (urgh, see *) before bed, Fordyce laughs off the suggestion that she’s wasting her time and she can learn something from the show, to which Marler exclaims with a pessimistic, “WHAT?!”

GF

*Personal bugbear – Fordyce, please stop calling a show “pod” – it’s creepy.